hey this is real quick, I'm in anderson (the electric city! lol, we named our minivan sparky b/c of that!). I've still got my celly and I'm gonna re the contract. I miss you all, but I'm so so so glad to be here! Leave comments or e-mail me, and i'll email you my new phone number and address!!!!
Posts
Hey people, like the new look? It's simple... I'm working on it. You can now post comments after my blog posts; so by all means, take advantage of that! I want to hear what whoever is reading my blog has to say :-D
OH, and tell me if you cant read it to well, so i know to change the colors and what not
If it doesn't load all the way, like you can only see one or two posts, just hit the go button again on the link bar, it's been doing that a bit... I'll see what's up... probably b/c i've been screwing around on the template...
Sorry for all the screw ups ;-)
If you want to see more of my poetry, go to www.poetry.com and in the search, type in my name. If you don't know my name, well I am not going to type it for all to see. However, I will give you this hint... if you are somehow able to find a picture of a girl with long black hair wearing a blue tee shirt and pin-covered backpack crouching next to a boy with a pink mohawk in a red tee and what appear to be Chuck Taylors. The boy is signing a small notebook that she holds out... my name should be at the bottom of the page. You have to use search engines. Try: Diocese of Charleston Miscellany and World Youth Day. World Youth Day was in July 2002. Happy hunting! (I know it can be done because I did it on Alta Vista ;-) )
Taste the brutal honey. Sickly sweet with such a bitter aftertaste. It slips on my tongue and it goes down smoothly. I shiver with anticipation. In the depths, the liquid burns, bringing up the flames within me. The fire brings my blood to a boil. I shiver, though my skin glistens.
It is better to have loved, because to have loved and lost just sucks
I could spend forever in your eyes, if you would only look my way
Just random mutterings of this occasionally lonely babe...
This one isn't to bad. Mostly prose but I've worked in a little poetry...
When's the last time I saw you? When did you last come to call? We used to speak so freely but it seems like you've just forgotten that all. I miss you so much. I miss your laughter and your touch. You're eyes would sparkle with excitement, laughing at me when I told you that all your ideas were bent. I could never ever forget you. God ... I loved you so damn much. What I wouldn't give to be in y...
Trying to think of something spunky or poetic to post and I'm failing. I looked up some old poetry of mine that I haven't posted anywhere, and it was not really as smooth as I'd like. It sounded so young... not as to age of poet, but as to age of skill. And it wasn't. It was about falling, and like how I don't want to be caught when I'm falling. I'm blinded by the clouds drifting by. It's about falling in love. Or Infatuation, really. Because really, I was an infatuation junkie in high school. Geez, those were the day's weren't they?
All my intense poetry is depressing and dark anyway. I like the spunky stuff like "affair with an older man," not that I've ever had an affair with an older man. But the poetry flows and rolls quite well. I like it when it does that.
Let it flow let it tumble... let it ramble and rumble...
see where it goes and see if she knows...
how sexy she ambles
I should probably write something about ...
Inside jokes!!! If you don't get them, you're not meant to:
DREW! What are you teaching Malik!!! ... ... View of Drew, Drew's view, View of Drew ... ... Umm... Marisol, do you have to use the bathroom? I hope not! ... ... TUMS ... ... Jimmy, Anne Marie is puking and there's a half naked guy trying to break into our room... ... Sigh, Umm. NO! ... ... Zzzz ... ... Here's the Kick off, hope you're not sick of, reliant K and all the songs we play ... ... SCUBA STEVE ... ... Parker parker parker ... ... Panda Pong! ... ... Well, I didn't really forget the banner ... ... BREATH, girl! breath! ... ... There was a hott girl laying on your bed earlier ... ... Hey! This is like the real world! Only not! Because we're not going to get drunk and have sex and, Oooh! There's Corona in the fridge! ... ... The Piranha only bite you, Jason ... ... BRUSTERS! ... ... Fortune cookies ... ... Mini Hank! ... ... Let's go back to Bumpkin Street and see who...
I found this instant messanger conversation especially humorous!
Mark: Hey! I will renounce teasing
mE: Commence groveling
Mark: First, I am sorry. You must tell me more forcefully that I'm annoying you
Mark: I hope you will continue to keep me unblocked although I do not deserve it
mE: I DO NOT LIKE IT WHEN YOU ARE "JUST MESSING AROUND"
mE: Is that better? Or do you need a few slaps to the stomache to reinforce it
mE: Keep groveling
Mark: I was dense, OK? I didn't see that I was annoying you
mE: Even when I was telling you?
mE: Keep groveling. I will check this IM screen between Rum and Monkey articles, it only takes me a minute or two to finish each one.
Mark: I know I should've seen it comming, but for some reason, I didn't
mE: You are bad at groveling...
mE: Go look it up in the dictionary
Mark: um... thanks
Mark: At least consider forgiving me!
mE: See what I typed?
mE: Grovel, boy
Mark: It's hard to grovel on IM
mE: You aren'...
"UnDead Clown Carnival" "Family Fun Festival" "Hell's Little Helpers" "Catholic Monster Bash" All suggestions for the St. Mary's up-and-coming "safe place" for the young'uns to trick-or-treat (I'll show you trick, you little...)
Jenna: "All Saint's Shindig!"
Steven: "Apparently, we're in the deep south now....
All Saint's Spectacular!
Not Bad. But... just realized.... We had better never abbreviate that...
FairiKitty: I am done playing game
Mxeroll: you shouldnt play comp games it rots your brain
FairiKitty: no, it was a smart persons game
FairiKitty: Trivial Pursuit!
Mxeroll: Wow, I guess that makes you a smart person
FairiKitty: I am!
FairiKitty: I am the smartest person in this whole house!
Mxeroll: hush you're home alone prob
FairiKitty: So....
shadowghoul1015: so did you figure out what all your taking
FairiKitty: stuff
shadowghoul1015: lol
FairiKitty: I've got all the clothes i'm takin packed, 'cept shoes, I've just gotta do the rest of the stuff
shadowghoul1015: thats good
FairiKitty: like hair spray and make up... Important stuff
shadowghoul1015: oh yeah, i never have to worry about that stuff
FairiKitty: I've got the books I wanna take and a photo album and my cd's and a crucifix
FairiKitty: and the throw blanket from Johns Island
shadowghoul1015: oh yeah
shadowghoul1015: cant forget the blanket
FairiKitty: what else do i ne...
There are probably a million things I could've done in the past four hours, but instead, I made seven pancakes and ate all of them and I watched See Jane Date . A fabulous movie/book for the millions of you out there in BloggerLand who have yet to review either.
I really... really... REALLY should be packing...
*Sigh...*
I found this slightly humorous (as most conversations with this person are!) and thought I'd post it. No telling if he think's its humorous. But, on the bright side he did say "lol"
JDB: tell me something, and be honest about it...
mE: okay
mE: i might plead the fifth
JDB: how would you describe me...
mE: tall
JDB: personality wise
mE: why
JDB: i'm just trying to figure it out what people really think of me...
mE: I've told you before...
mE: You want me to be brutally honest?
JDB: yes
mE: i find you cocky and rather annoying at times
JDB: ok
JDB: but would i be myself if i wasn't?
mE: The world may never know
JDB: i'm trying to change for the better, but i have to know my flaws first, so i can change
mE: You talk about yourself too much and you're moody sometimes for little to no real reason
mE: teenage angst is really really really annoying
JDB: i agree...
mE: oh good, then stop
JDB: lol
I just got back from helping mark move in to his dorm room. He complianed it was dumpy, but hey, it could be worse. His RA is .... GUESS??? It's Casey Wiley ! How trippy! Lol! But I had fun. Geez, I wish I was going to college... but I'll be there. I'm doing something really good this year. It'll be good for me, ya know.
You're late.
You're stunning.
: you wanna know what she said in an email? that she loved me
: that's intense... esp comming from Her
: yea.. she even said that it was weird.. but it felt right for her to say it... and i just... didnt feel quite the same way
: Wow
: Did you tell her you didn't?
: i didnt know how i felt about her and it was tearing me apart... so she left to spare me the pain
: wow
: Okay, when I talk to her, do you mind if i tell her that it's worthless to waste yourself over a dumb guy?
: Because, were kids
: as long as you dont mention me.. otherwise all you will get is random jibberish
: Okay, I dig
: shes fighting demons in her head that wont let her forget anything.. they are tring to make her weak.. and shes losing to them
: Damnit
I just found out that one of my really good friends is in the hospital with a hole in her chest. She stabbed herself. She tried to kill herself. I was supposed to call her last week. I really should've. I mean, I KNOW it's not my fault... I'm not trying to say that it is. You never know how much good a friend to talk with can be, though.
She's physically able to live. She regained consciousness... but the question is whether or not she will allow herself to. I really don't know what to do. I don't know how to deal with this.
It was over a guy. She said she loved him and he wasn't quite sure he felt the same way. It was tearing him apart, so she left to spare him the pain...
I need to tell her that it's worthless to waste yourself over a guy. I want to tell her she's being selfish... running from the pain, running from life. The girl I knew never ran from a damn thing.
I just don't know what to tell her. I don't know how to deal ...
Made a bit of a silly mistake.... I started watching Pretty In Pink . It's a great movie and all, but to have loved and lost and then to watch a romantic movie... Well... it turns some girls into a mushy pile of painful emotions. It really hurts... That's why I like The Breakfast Club and St. Elmo's Fire more than I like the other Brat Pack films...
So, it was Jeremy in 1983 in his Ocean Pacific tee, who got a bloody knee, On his skateboard in the half pipe in the backyard that Tuesday night
And I'm only gonna pierce my left ear, and I've been workin' on this mustache all summer long, and my favorite band will always be "Tears for Fears" and i'm gonna wear a pink tux to the prom
Cuttin' class through the first floor window
He's drivin' fast 'cause he never did a thing slow
And I look up to my big bro 'cause in the 80's all the ladies grabbed his hand and couldn't let go
And I'm only gonna pierce m...
Allen: guess what
Mary: What?
Allen: sun's back out
Allen: haha
Allen: sorry
Mary: It's all good
Allen: it stinks how stuff like that works out
Mary: I know, right
Mary: So if the suns out why aren't you at the pool?
Allen: because i decided not to go
Allen: i was there, it was cloudy and rainy
Allen: i left, sun came out
Allen: i gave up
Mary: lol!
Mary: And if you went back it would get cloudy again
Allen: well of course
Mary: haha
Fire On Crack he says. It looks like fire, but it's crazy and demented.
See, if I tried to draw like this, it would never work out. He laughs. It wouldn't look anything like that.
"You're poetry is great!" I haven't found a muse in a while "A muse?" Inspiration. "What? I'm not inpsirational enough?" I can't write the passionate poetry I used to. "What? No dark depression to suck the passion from?" Exactly.
This is okay... but I like your poetry much better he says, handing me back the sheet of paper.
What do you mean you can't sing? I heard you in the car. "My voice was drowned out by the music." "You've got a great voice! You should try and sing with... you know... people that sing." I look at him. There's nothing left to do but laugh.
I pull down the zipper. The satiny fabric slips off my skin and sinks lazily onto the floor. I step gingerly out of the burgundy prom dress and proceed to reaquaint it with its hanger. "Now," I sigh, stepping towards the closet. "You don't have a mirror down there do you?" I turn from where I'm standing, elbow deep in satin, lace, and chiffon. He is lying on my bed, turned towards the wall. His face is engulfed in pillows. "Shut up!" He exclaims, but I think I detected a slight hint of laughter.... "I was just kidding," I grin and pull down a dark purple knee length dress. I slip into it. "Now this one, I have never worn anywhere." From his hiding place on the bed he replies, "Doesn't it bother you to have expensive dresses just sitting in your closet?" I think about it. I adjust the dress. "Not really. Open your eyes." He turns around and sits up. "I really like that one. Purple is a good color on y...
I almost drove down to Cola today to chill w/ Allen. We were chatting online and he said he was going to go swimming, and I said That sounds like fun! wish I could join ya and he said You could, but it would be a bit of a drive and I was like well it's only 1.5 hrs . But when I was like 10 minutes away from my house and he called my cell phone and said it looks like rain, lets do this another time
Well then I went home and made pancakes... and my were they good 'uns, too!
Today, I went to daily mass and then I drove around. For some reason, driving around today was more carefree and uplifting than it usually is. I felt like I could do absolutly anything in the world. In reality, I just drove down Washington, took a right on Main, left on Broad and cruised Broad until it's end where it dropped me off on to McDaniel, left onto woodland, and from thence I don't know the street names, but I drove up to Tech and realized that I didn't have the address of the place where I need to send my transcripts. So I took the long way out of Tech and drove home.
I was going a little faster than I should and wishing I was in a better car so I could embrace the curves like a long lost friend. It's really great driving around without a care in the world. I haven't driven myself around in a while, so I think that's why I missed it so. My sister has taken us to youth group the past two sundays. Everytime I go out with a friend they are driving... ...
There's a new show called "Gay HollyWood." And there's also some show about gay men teaching straight men how to dress or something like that. Well I'm not about to tell people what to do... but I think this flaunting your lebian/gay lifestyle is getting a little out of hand. I heard something about a school for lesbian/gay. We're all proud of who we are, but I think it's a little out of hand...
Okay I was online and I was asking Allen, who is episcopal about the whole scandal thing going on and I got all curious about episcopalianism (?) in general because I don't know much about it and I was telling him that:
Mary: I'm just generally curious by nature and I'm just now starting to want to learn more about other religions and denominations, because I don't like being ignorant... you know? I'm used to people coming up to me and swearing up and down that catholics worship mary,
Allen: no...catholics ask mary to pray for them
Allen: correct?
Mary: Yay!
It's so super that someone finally knows the truth and I don't have to beat it into their head.
But then again there's also
Mary: Do episcopals believe that the bread and wine are true Body and Blood of Christ?
Allen: now that's something i've never thought to ask
Mary: Wow
Mary: I will look up on website (I had found website about the episcopal church)
Allen: ok
So, h...
Guy problems ARE complicated! I'm not even dating and I'm having problems with TWO guys! One from the very recent past and one from... well just a friend really... but he's pretty awesome, and cute, and sweet, and I would date him, if I were dating, and if he were interested (he is getting over a long term relationship) and if I weren't so short!!!
Anyway, youth group was groovy fun today... well except for all the noise makers... It was Lauren Bernard's b-day... she's turning fifteen... there were a lot of people at youth group though... and we talked about dressing modestly... yea... can we say controversy! Well, it's all good... hey, next sunday is my last sunday! Ahhhh!!!! I might cry... but I'll try not to!
Well, I really haven't a ton to say
Just got back from working on Buddy Folk's house... we did the out side... It was hard work.... I'm thinking it wasn't the best idea for me to go, still recuperating and all... it was almost 30 minutes work 15 minutes break for me... and that's not usually like me... i usually go all morning and take one break maybe... just get water or gatorade handed to me. (or thrown up to me if I'm on the roof) It was mostly yard work and I'm not used to yard work..... and this was tough stuff. Vines growing into the house... grass and weeds as tall as I am (maybe taller) and just a lot of pulling vines and cutting and stuff for me... there were about a million lawn mowers and weed eaters going and then Jimmy, Kevin, and David were on the roof with the chain saw cutting down the tree branches... and I think we took down one tree... The difference was phenomenal... I wish I could be there when we start to work on the inside!!! Nobody from St. Mary Mag came, and Allen could...
Hey all... i haven't posted in so long but I'm going to start back up because maybe somebody will want to know what's going on in my life after I leave.... You know, for the volunteer program? Anyway, I completed another session of HomeWorks (That makes G'Vegas and Johns Island for this year). Steven and I were in charge of a roofing site... I was the oldest and most experienced person there! That was terrifying... I've never even used a circular saw! (I don't like saws... I only like the midar saw...) We finished our project anyway... There were major hotties at Johns Island as well... To bad I'm so short because a couple of 'em were rather tall. Pat was so hot. He was super nice also, I say this because people will think I just look at the body and not at the person... No, Pat is an awesome person! Also he calls me Hottie and I call him Sexy ;-) There was this other guy there who was pretty awesome and all the girls on my site said it was pretty darn ...