You know you're a Lipstick Lesbian if...

**you think God made women better-looking than men so that it would be obvious at a glance which was the superior sex.

**you derive a sense of power from towering over people when you wear high heels.

*you think of your makeup as warpaint.

*you think that "feminine feminist" is not an oxymoron, but a redundancy.

**you can do anything a man can do -- backwards and in high heels.

*you think of straight women as "the ones who settle for second best."

**you think Adam was a rough draft.

*you accept the "universal he" because, just as men are incomplete women, male words -- he, man, male -- are incomplete versions of female words -- she, woman, female.

Now, y'all... I'm not a Lipstick Lesbian. I only agree with the two stared ** ones...