February 23rd 9 AM, eastern standard time. From here on in I blog without a script
See if anything comes of it, instead of my old shit
It has been a gnarly two years.
Two years ago, for better or for worse, I had to restart the life I'd been expecting. In some ways, it turns out, it was for the better. In some ways, it was for the worse. I tend to make wild jumps and go "all-in" on decisions when I'm floundering. This lead to an intense three month relationship with a man who was an extremely poor fit for me, (as I was for him!). A feeling of being lost and frustrated in my romantic life as well as my career lead me to launch myself at an opportunity with little foresight.
I was offered a job in a new field (though somewhat adjacent to my career) in a location that was totally opposite of where I was living. From living in on of the most lively neighborhoods in Charlotte, North Carolina to a town I envisioned as a Hallmark town: North Conway, New Hampshire. Population: 2,500. (Plus 10,000 tourists from the greater Boston area)
With stars in my eyes, I envisioned strolling down the sidewalks past the adorable boutiques breathing in the crisp winter air. Snowflakes falling gently into my hair as I sipped my coffee from a local independent coffee shop, no doubt owned by a sassy, successful woman who will immediately befriend me. I would meet my sweater-wearing hometown man who would show me the meaning of Christmas! I would climb the mountains and smile with my friends, thrilled at the views and relishing our accomplishments.
Now, I don't know how much of this I realized I was truly dreaming about. If you asked me, I would have told you I was moving for the proximity of the mountains. However, the uptick in Hallmark movie viewing speaks volumes. And actually, much of what I envisioned was true.
However, I didn't realize that in a rural town, the only sidewalks would be going past the shopping area. I never ever would have believed that sidewalks would be a thing that I missed.
I love going for long rambling walks. In Charlotte, I would pop in my headphones and go for a walk with no itinerary. Just start to mosey in the direction of another neighborhood, deciding along the way where I might stop for a treat. These would be rambling walks through tree lined neighborhoods. I would wave at the neighbors in Plaza Midwood. One would ask me how far I'd walked upon my return. I would inevitably end up at a bakery, brewery, or coffee shop to treat myself or meet up with friends.
This is not a thing I can do in North Conway. I stroll through town, grab a coffee, and by the time I'm finished strolling through town my coffee isn't halfway done. There's just not much town up here.
Unless I want to run on rural roads, I am limited to a 5 mile straight out and back. And sometimes I do run on the rural roads, but it's always the same route. There's just not much town.
And that's okay. There doesn't need to be a big bustling metropolis for most people. Many people are wildly happy here and feel so lucky to live here. But after 18 months of trying to be happy up here, I have been wildly unsuccessful. I have been unable to "bloom where I'm planted." Failure to thrive, you might say.
Roads, Pixel? Really? You're moving because there's not enough roads and sidewalks? Well, no, that's not it. But it is one of the first things that bothered me, that I could never shake off.
People say it's difficult to make new friends as an adult. I never found that to be true... until I moved up here. It is so easy to make friends in Charlotte! New young people are moving there all the time, looking for friend circles to join or create. And the people in Charlotte are so very active. Not just skiing and hiking, which are really great fun activities and I adore them. On the weekends. The daily run clubs in Charlotte are quite possibly the biggest draw back home. Every day of the week, groups meet up at restaurants or breweries to run together. Or go on long bike rides, or do yoga. Or walk their dogs. The list goes on. Suffice to say, people of Charlotte love being active and being social.
It is quite possible that I didn't give North Conway a fair shake, but it's difficult up here. When I mention run clubs, everyone excitedly tells me about the same run club which meets May through October to trail run. The appear to have a winter Sunday run once a month, but it is at someone's house. That's it. That is the extent of the running clubs up here. And it is not full of young people wanting to socialize and make new friends. It is full of people who have lived here for years. The greet you cheerfully, and they are so nice! But they aren't inviting you to be a friend, and to meet up at any other time.
I have a few friends who run, and I run with them on occasion. I have tried to set up social dates, such as dinners or coffee meet ups, and I run into that inevitable fruitless "oh we should do that!" These people are busy with the lives they already have set up for themselves. They don't have time for a new person.
And so, because it is in some way the easiest choice, I am going home. I am going home to rambling walks and bike rides. I am going home to people swapping phone numbers after run club and being open to social activities.
In many ways, Charlotte feels like a small town. When you stay in your neighborhood, you're constantly running into friends.
More than anything, I miss that.
Friends.
It has been a gnarly two years.
Two years ago, for better or for worse, I had to restart the life I'd been expecting. In some ways, it turns out, it was for the better. In some ways, it was for the worse. I tend to make wild jumps and go "all-in" on decisions when I'm floundering. This lead to an intense three month relationship with a man who was an extremely poor fit for me, (as I was for him!). A feeling of being lost and frustrated in my romantic life as well as my career lead me to launch myself at an opportunity with little foresight.
I was offered a job in a new field (though somewhat adjacent to my career) in a location that was totally opposite of where I was living. From living in on of the most lively neighborhoods in Charlotte, North Carolina to a town I envisioned as a Hallmark town: North Conway, New Hampshire. Population: 2,500. (Plus 10,000 tourists from the greater Boston area)
With stars in my eyes, I envisioned strolling down the sidewalks past the adorable boutiques breathing in the crisp winter air. Snowflakes falling gently into my hair as I sipped my coffee from a local independent coffee shop, no doubt owned by a sassy, successful woman who will immediately befriend me. I would meet my sweater-wearing hometown man who would show me the meaning of Christmas! I would climb the mountains and smile with my friends, thrilled at the views and relishing our accomplishments.
Now, I don't know how much of this I realized I was truly dreaming about. If you asked me, I would have told you I was moving for the proximity of the mountains. However, the uptick in Hallmark movie viewing speaks volumes. And actually, much of what I envisioned was true.
However, I didn't realize that in a rural town, the only sidewalks would be going past the shopping area. I never ever would have believed that sidewalks would be a thing that I missed.
I love going for long rambling walks. In Charlotte, I would pop in my headphones and go for a walk with no itinerary. Just start to mosey in the direction of another neighborhood, deciding along the way where I might stop for a treat. These would be rambling walks through tree lined neighborhoods. I would wave at the neighbors in Plaza Midwood. One would ask me how far I'd walked upon my return. I would inevitably end up at a bakery, brewery, or coffee shop to treat myself or meet up with friends.
This is not a thing I can do in North Conway. I stroll through town, grab a coffee, and by the time I'm finished strolling through town my coffee isn't halfway done. There's just not much town up here.
Unless I want to run on rural roads, I am limited to a 5 mile straight out and back. And sometimes I do run on the rural roads, but it's always the same route. There's just not much town.
And that's okay. There doesn't need to be a big bustling metropolis for most people. Many people are wildly happy here and feel so lucky to live here. But after 18 months of trying to be happy up here, I have been wildly unsuccessful. I have been unable to "bloom where I'm planted." Failure to thrive, you might say.
Roads, Pixel? Really? You're moving because there's not enough roads and sidewalks? Well, no, that's not it. But it is one of the first things that bothered me, that I could never shake off.
People say it's difficult to make new friends as an adult. I never found that to be true... until I moved up here. It is so easy to make friends in Charlotte! New young people are moving there all the time, looking for friend circles to join or create. And the people in Charlotte are so very active. Not just skiing and hiking, which are really great fun activities and I adore them. On the weekends. The daily run clubs in Charlotte are quite possibly the biggest draw back home. Every day of the week, groups meet up at restaurants or breweries to run together. Or go on long bike rides, or do yoga. Or walk their dogs. The list goes on. Suffice to say, people of Charlotte love being active and being social.
It is quite possible that I didn't give North Conway a fair shake, but it's difficult up here. When I mention run clubs, everyone excitedly tells me about the same run club which meets May through October to trail run. The appear to have a winter Sunday run once a month, but it is at someone's house. That's it. That is the extent of the running clubs up here. And it is not full of young people wanting to socialize and make new friends. It is full of people who have lived here for years. The greet you cheerfully, and they are so nice! But they aren't inviting you to be a friend, and to meet up at any other time.
I have a few friends who run, and I run with them on occasion. I have tried to set up social dates, such as dinners or coffee meet ups, and I run into that inevitable fruitless "oh we should do that!" These people are busy with the lives they already have set up for themselves. They don't have time for a new person.
And so, because it is in some way the easiest choice, I am going home. I am going home to rambling walks and bike rides. I am going home to people swapping phone numbers after run club and being open to social activities.
In many ways, Charlotte feels like a small town. When you stay in your neighborhood, you're constantly running into friends.
More than anything, I miss that.
Friends.
(These two photos are from my last run club in Charlotte. I was surprised with cake. I cried)
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